Get all 22 I Divorced Life releases available on Bandcamp and save 80%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Help, Scavenge like a Silly Robber (single), Behold The Miracle Of Whatever The Hell This Is, You Look Sick, CAKE, Speak No More Of This (split single), Spooky Little Doll Hands, Wrath (original score), and 14 more.
1. |
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2. |
Hunt The Meaning
04:02
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I feel so ill
But it is in a new way
This pattern it could end
These days will bring
All the things I have been wanting
My mind is still at war with itself
Prey my wishes
Until they die
Hunt the meaning
Until it fades away
I want to go
Find the last bit of my self
My mind is still held up by itself
Hunt the meaning
Until it fades away
Prey my wishes
Until they pass away
Open your eyes
Let you heart be your guide I am
Going to
Do that
Feel what you feel
And the rest will find peace I know
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3. |
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My resentment towards
This wicked world
This gruesome globe
Is growing and tearing
All hope and joy apart
I will never
Appreciate
The magnitude
Of life’s gift to me
Or my possibilities
If I can
Cope with this evil world I’ll
Never forget
To say thanks
For my life and all my friends
Nathalie, you’re my heart I’ll
Dig mine out
and everything you will ever need
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4. |
It Splits
04:00
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I know why you want it to go away
I know why you wanted to go away
You will never know
What you are running from
Until it splits you apart
You will hit the ground
And wonder why is
Everything so cold
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5. |
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It is a hitch
That my state of mind
Has worn me down
People around me
Are now able to glimpse
Right inside my head
It is no longer
Just a pungent jury
My thoughts aloud!
When my stomach
Is filled up with blaze
And my pulse accelerates
Then I know I will
Never be able to
Step inside myself again
Oh how I wish that
I’ll never again have to
Hang from the ceiling
And gaze upon myself
These days bring nothing but
Injurious input and qualm
My hands are tied behind
My back and my knees have
Been pierced by thorns
Is it a secret?
Do I want to take off?
I sure find comfort
In my thoughts of flight
If it wasn’t for you
I’d be melting away
I’d be pouring down
I’d be bleeding out
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6. |
Not Worth A Nickle
04:12
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I lost myself
In all this anger
This hate is old
Old and not able
My body is done
Tired and sore all over
Not worth a nickel
Or a dime
I keep having pain
Excruciating and
Everlasting
When will this be gone?
I'm at the verge
Of breaking
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7. |
The World Turns Cold
05:22
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Let us have a conversation
Let me tell you what I think
Do you want to see?
The real pure me?
Take your pen
And write this down
For I am out of sync
With this world's time
I just need a tool
To get all better
I have what's right for you
It is a little white pill
90 mg's of pure bliss
Mist, apathy and indifference
I
Don’t know what
To do
Now
With this pill
The world turns cold
And I cannot think
Straight or feel a thing
You don't know what life is
Until you've lost it
Take your pills
And let them burn
For I am done with
Sedatives and doctors
Once I saw the light
I wouldn't go back to that
No…
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8. |
I Am Made Of Everything
04:48
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I am made of everything
You did to me
Every nasty comment
Every hurtful look
Each and every blow
You made my world collapse
I am made of everything
You said to me
Nothing is forgotten
It all stays with me
Each and every day
Whenever I feel small
Whenever I feel weak
Whenever I feel evil
Whenever I feel glum
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9. |
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Everyday I do my best to keep a humble attitude
I’m grateful for the bliss of life and everything surrounding me but
When their eyes meet mine I can feel
That I am in the way,
I can’t speak, I can’t think I am not entitled to my opinion
My very presence makes them feel huge
Too much sensitivity on my part makes them think
That I’m small and do not
Make a difference, let me tell you
There is a significant difference
And a void between us
That will me allow me to
Fly off
While being on fire
Fly off
While screaming and bleeding
Cheer me as I fall
Pad me on the back
Put my glasses on
And look at black spots
When we all go down
Remember this offer
I could hold your eyes
And make them shine again
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10. |
Into The Dew Of The Dawn
03:57
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All that I wish for
Is that the world says “stop”
It will scream and howl
Until we are gone
We have left a mark
That’s for sure
All I desire
Is that we are wiped away
From the face of the earth
An ignorant race
That has had too much time
Time to spoil and wreck
Time to kill and hate
Time to not realize the meaning
Of our own existence
Our lives will perish
In the most beautiful
Blaze, it is the fire
to end this chapter
And start from scratch
Without us
My soul will leave
My aching
Body
And be absorbed
Into the water
Into the ice
Into the dew of the dawn
Into the fog
Into the mist
Into the flames
Now it all makes sense
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11. |
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One thing I just can't stand
Is watching you suffering
I would like to inflict
All your pain onto myself
Wouldn't I just love to
Force your hurt to eat itself?
From the bottom to the top
I will make the illness die
When your skin is on fire
When your lungs are worse
When your throat retracts
I will take it all
When your eyes are blinded
When your tongue swell up
When your chest collapse
I will take it all
See, there are days when I don’t feel
Just how much it hurts
Let me know then
So I can shape up
‘Cause when I look at your eyes
Sometimes I see fear
I will not allow it
To break you in half
These days will somehow be different
When I get a grip
Your pain will falter,
But slowly
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12. |
Aid Me
04:52
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It feels just like
Everyone is dead
My efforts: wasted
My talent: fading
Please aid my escape
And help me far away from
This useless dark hole
That is trying to devour
Everything I like about me
And all my wishes
Please give me strength
To flee and never look back
Aid me
But never care for me
Soothe me
But never choose me
Just go
Never
Return to this void
Trust broke years ago
Simple living
Small thoughts
They will wreck my gift
They will abuse my trust
Well now
I'll be on
My way out of here
For now
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13. |
Innocence
05:06
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One day I will meet you
Feel the need to flee from
All the things I must say
Hurt you did and will do
When that day arrives I will
Not fly off
In a sense
You have done me
A favor
I’ll hate you forever
One could say
That it takes two
But I know
You’re all alone
You have left me fearing
Everybody’s motives
All the tender sweet words
Now invokes my anger
I no longer feel calm here
I’m all alone
You know if I had some sense
You could never have
Been such a spoiled princess
And my mind would be fine
Just to sum up happenings
You succeeded in
Manipulating me every
Way you could think off
I can feel that I will never
Be done scolding you
I think it’s a fair price for
Crippling my thoughts
If you ever come across some
Sense and feel like
Apologizing save it
You’re dead to me
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14. |
Mirror; My Face!
02:32
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It is here
I’ve found my heart
Charred and cold
Just like I wanted it
Now I will just
Put it back into
My chest, breathe
And then walk away
This is here
Mirror; my face!
Never look at it
Unless it calls
Out to you
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15. |
Scream The Awful Truth
07:07
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This I haven't thought of
So dumb
Bliss in its most true form
Always
This is god
It is nothing
Worth to me
This is hell
Getting warmer
True,
I didn't always
Treat myself to what was
Best and now I will
Take what I
Own (what?)
Ripping everyone to
Pieces, debris, shreds and
Dust, I must make it up to me
(What?)
My savior
She will call the shots
This breath of life will be my first
Away is my pain
Away not forgotten
This grace is
Oh so evident
You watch me and
Reach out your arms
This day is my last
This day keeps on shining
In your eyes
I may seem just fine
But lurking
Right beneath is fear
Of doing you wrong
Of losing my last hope
The crows will
Gather around me
Their beaks will
SCREAM the awful truth
"You'll have to believe"
"You'll live to see wonders"
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16. |
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Countless (callous)
Instances of pain
Unrelenting judgments
Made by gloating egos
Once enough
Time has passed
They will
Burst right into the most
Green and beautiful flames
There is room enough
For me
Even though I don’t
Want to smell your hate
Oh I wish you harm
Again
Anything to prevent you
From gazing upon me
Every time you project
Your pitiful self
Unto me you will trip
And fall right into a
Vast abyss
All your
Inner demons
Will flaunt all their evil
Show you the
Only truth
This is the part
Where I tell you
Just to think of
The repercussions
This is a segment
Of warning
You will fail
I will make sure
This is segment of warning…
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17. |
In This Way We Erupt
04:02
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In this way we erupt
Out of grey and death
We will float in the sky
Like a couple of ghosts
We are divorced
From a life of gloom
We are divorced
From the emptiness
You are magical
The sky cracks open
Seeping blood
Flushing hearts
Equine silhouettes rushing
Off to much better places
The sky erupts
Bursting out tears
Joyfully laughing
Horses in the night
We can almost touch them
Make them all our friends
Ride off into darkness
Make our way to the end
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18. |
Write
03:57
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Every time I sit down
To write all these words
I never get closer
To the answers I seek
Waste of breath
If this just goes on then
I won’t be around
Much longer
This is my call to
Tie my guts around my
Neck and just try out my
Wings
See if I can fly
There is one way
It is all I can say
Let me go
I feel so tired and
Worn out
I’m out of my mind
Always this
Confusion as to what
I’ll do
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19. |
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...This is the end
Never again will you have to relive
How many times have you heard
Your dreams crash down on the ground?
This is the place
Where you don't have to fear
How many times have you smelt
The stench of hate right below?
This is the time
It is now and not then
How many times have you felt
The doubt creep into your heart?
This is confirmation
Of everything you knew from the get-go
How many times have you said
Her words did not knock you out?
Her words did nothing!
This is your goal
You proved her wrong
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I Divorced Life Hamburg, Germany
Experimental sound artist based in Hamburg, Germany
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